Thursday, May 27, 2010

A NMC? Say It Ain't So!

The No Movement Clause; the bane of the New York Rangers, err, well. The No Movement Clause; the scourge of the Montreal Canadiens. Ok, well, this lede could just read Scott Gomez sucks, but that's not the point (it's always the point).

I was taking a look at the Buffalo Sabres roster this morning on CapGeek, why? WHY NOT? I knew they'd re-signed Mike Grier (because psst! I write about them), but hadn't seen that he had received a full NMC. Mike Grier? A NMC? Did Regier just suddenly become a nefarious small market Glen Sather? For God's sakes no (for the record, I actually like giving Grier the NMC, why the hell not yah dig?).

That got me thinking; what other joke NMCs are floating around the league? But not just that, what are the oddest stipulations in a NMC out there? Remember Tomas Kaberle's "list"? Yeah, there's a shit tonne (Canadian spelling!) around the league, hit the break to read up on the joke.

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Sergei Gonchar Attends No Pants Party; Solo

You know, if I lost in a championship game, to a Czech team that wasn't stolen by Dominik Hasek, I'd walk around pantless too.  I'm not sure how that makes a lick of sense, but Gonch agrees.  Oh, Gonch agrees.

Thursday, May 20, 2010

Battle of Eastern Conference Finalist...Rappers?

Outside of just ridiculously hating the original song "Beamer, Benz, or Bentley", by Lloyd Banks or whatever miserable individual thought that up, this dude actually does a pretty damn good job. He can talk fast. And news flash; he's from West Chester, making him white.

Then of course, I'm sure you've already heard 'Feels Like 93' by Annakin Slayd. No? Ok.

So I guess the question is; a) where the hell are the Sharks and Hawks fans spitting fire? b) who does it better: sHERBS or Slayd?


Sunday, May 16, 2010

Who Will Win The Cup?

Check out the image; a lovely poll provided by the World Wide Leader, shows by state, who's rootin' for who.

Some pretty interesting points. 

1. No shit the west coast is pulling for the Sharks.

2. West Conference is pretty heavily favored, eh?

3. Caps fans really are pulling for the Habs now, Maryland and West Virginia, and almost Virginia picking them.

4. Pennsylvania, seriously, rather, Philadelphia, seriously?  I get the bandwagon juice heads from Jersey, but come on.

5. Arkansas sucks; all 50 of em.

Thursday, May 13, 2010

Montreal: Your Celebrations Baffle Me

You won.  You defeated the President's Trophy winners, you defeated the defending Stanley Cup champions in successive series.  You're the first team to ever accomplish the feat.  Then you take to the streets.  Then all good will is lost, because well, you're Montreal.

This morning has been awesome for me; there is nothing better than watching riot videos on Youtube; except this one.  You guys get a fun surprise in the first minute of this one.

So most of that is cheeky fun, the dancing, the hootin' n hollerin' that's fine.  Yeah, climbing light posts is stupid, especially when you have tiny junk, the fire jumping is unnecessary, but you can tell that's early.  Light's are still on, females are still in the streets, the next video, well, the first 15 seconds probably says it all.

All in all, word is there were over 30 arrests, broken windows, looting, all that good stuff. For shame; here I thought there were 2 more rounds left in this here playoff season.

Anyways, if you're lookin' to get a feel for the fun, if that's what you wanna call it, just browse this guy's video collection.

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

The AHL Final Four Are Set

Last night saw the Texas Star's win in OT over the Chicago Wolves, the 6-5 game 7 win was all that needed to be settled before the east and west finals get started.

Tonight sees the Hershey Bears (Washington Capitals) and Manchester Monarchs (LA Kings) set to square off for the East title. The Bears have actually had 12 straight days of rest after sweeping away Albany in the 2nd round, where as Manchester dispatched Worcester (San Jose Sharks) last Friday.

Eastern Conference Finals
E1-Hershey Bears vs. A3-Manchester Monarchs
Game 1 – Wed., May 12 – Manchester at Hershey, 7:00
Game 2 – Sat., May 15 – Manchester at Hershey, 7:00
Game 3 – Mon., May 17 – Hershey at Manchester, 7:00
Game 4 – Tue., May 18 – Hershey at Manchester, 7:00
*Game 5 – Thu., May 20 – Hershey at Manchester, 7:00
*Game 6 – Sat., May 22 – Manchester at Hershey, 7:00
*Game 7 – Sun., May 23 – Manchester at Hershey, 5:00

For those following at home; here are the guys from each roster with meaningful AHL minutes this year.

Hershey: Michal Neuvirth, Karl Alzner, John Carlson, Keith Aucoin, Alexandre Giroux, Matheiu Perreault
Manchester: Oscal Moller, Johnathan Bernier

Now for the Western Conference Finals, where the Texas Stars (Dallas Stars), in their first year of league play, have reached the final four, facing off against the 2nd best team in the regular season, the Hamilton Bulldogs (Montreal Canadiens).

Western Conference Finals
N1-Hamilton Bulldogs vs. W2-Texas Stars
Game 1 – Fri., May 14 – Texas at Hamilton, 7:30
Game 2 – Sun., May 16 – Texas at Hamilton, 2:00
Game 3 – Wed., May 19 – Hamilton at Texas, 8:30
Game 4 – Fri., May 21 – Hamilton at Texas, 8:30
*Game 5 – Sat., May 22 – Hamilton at Texas, 8:00
*Game 6 – Mon., May 24 – Texas at Hamilton, 7:30
*Game 7 – Wed., May 26 – Texas at Hamilton, 7:30

Now Hamilton is currently without the services of P.K. Subban, who is currently leading a dismantled defensive corps in Montreal, but have plenty of other options.  Here are the guys on these squads with some NHL minutes.

Hamilton: Ryan White, Yannick Weber
Texas Stars: Jamie Benn, Raymond Sawada, Warren Peters, Francis Wathier

All this just in case you cared.

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

No, It's Cool Man, Bring Your Green Hat

This isn't how I'd react to forcing a game 7, but I guess maybe they do things a little differently up there in the great white north? And no, I'm not talking about his pasty white ass.

Friday, May 7, 2010

But...But...Bath Fitter?

To say that 29 other teams, and their fans, don't want to see the Penguins win again, ever, would probably be an understatement. But now, this is just piling on. (See, I know how you Pittsburgh folk like to play the everyone is against us ploy, so I'll play along). Bath Fitter, yes, the maker of such products as...Bath Fitter, has thrown their hat in the ring behind the likes of Les Habitants.

Yesterday afternoon, on the official Bath Fitter Youtube account, BathFitterVideos, they posted the following video of one of their manufacturing facilities.

You know how I know they're serious? They have French and English versions of their video.

You know how I can't take them serious? Ole. Ole. Ole. That and the one lady.

But why is Bath Fitter putting their collective clout behind the Canadiens? Oh, a quick look on the About Us delivers the answer, "Some of the company’s first clients were the Sheraton Centre in Montreal, the Ch√Ęteau Laurier in Ottawa and the Royal York in Toronto." So as you can obviously see, [Insert Maple Leafs never in the playoffs joke here], it's only natural.

Kind of makes me wonder if there are any other companies that (outside of sponsorships) openly cheer for teams like this; kinda like Qdoba and the Penguins.

I guess one thing is for sure; Jaro Halak has probably got the most pimp bath fixtures EVAR!

Thursday, May 6, 2010

Big Buff Being...Effective?

Has the promise that Dustin Buffaloflinger showed in his early days, and by early days I mean 2007, finally all come together. Last night, using his size, snarl, and sexiness, I mean...scoring, Buff savagely ravaged the Nucks into submission. So well in fact, that Tiger Williams (not really Lil Tigger people) gave him a heckuva one fingered salute after a scrum. At the 21 second mark of the video, watch for Salad Fingers.

You know how I know he's not a hockey fan? The emo glasses for one, but he was sitting that whole time?! Just cause you're front and center doesn't mean you sit on your own thumbs all game long. Tsk tsk typical B.C. Starbucks employee.

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

The 2010 IIHF World Championships Commercial

So Universal Sports (who actually gets that channel) released their first commercial for the upcoming World Championships in Cologne, Germany. How's it rate?

Obviously it's not on par with the History Will Be Made spots, nor some of NBC's playoff promos, but it's still better than Versus, I guess.

They had me at bloody Suomi.
Fact: BanginPanger is not meant as an insult to the one and only Darren Pang, nor do I claim to be him. The views and opinions presented on BanginPanger are of my own, and no other namesake of the site, the NHL, Buffalo Sabres, Washington Capitals, or anyone else.